Do you like eat breakfast?Recently a test was given in the United States.Those tested included people of different ages ,from 12 to 80.During the experiment ,these people were given all kinds of breakfasts. And sometimes they got no breakfast at all.Special test were set up to see how well their bodies worked when they had eaten a certain kind of breakfast.The results show that if people breakfast ,he will work more better.

So ,eat breakfast is good for our health,If we eat breakfast before going to school ,we will learn more quickly,and llisten with more attention to class.

批 改 老 师maotouying评 分90分级 别优秀批 改

1.Do you like eat breakfast?本句话在此显得多余，建议去掉。

2.Those tested included people of different ages ,from 12 to 80. 前面一句话用a test，是单数形式，在这里要和前面保持一致，用The test.ages在此用age,不用复数形式。

3.During the experiment ,these people were given all kinds of breakfasts. During 强调的是在一个过程中发生的事情，从后面的内容来看，此处用In更合适。另外，breakfast是不可数的，不用加s。

4.Special test were set up to see how well their bodies worked when they had eaten a certain kind of breakfast. 该测试是单数，将were改为was.

5.The results show that if people breakfast ,he will work more better. 就本段时态来看，都是在叙述一项测试，用的都是过去式，此处也应该在时态上保持一致。另外，better前面不能用more,而是用much.最后一处，he要改为they,在人称上保持一致。本句话改为The result showed that if people had breakfast ,they would work much better.

6.第一段讲了测试，然后第二段讲启发，建议在此处添加一个过渡句。From the test, we can know that eat breakfast is good for our health.

1. The result showed that if people had breakfast ,they would work much better.

2.From the test, we can know that eat breakfast is good for our health.

本文第一段引入一个证据，第二段讲从中受到的启发，从内容上很像一段报纸、杂志期刊上的报道，表达方式很新颖。

文章在表达内容上存在一些不足之处，在此指出，请以后作者写作时注意。

1.时态上的前后不一致（批改第5处）；

2.单复数前后不一致（批改第2、4处）；

3.人称使用要一致（批改第5处）。

这些小问题是学生在写作上经常犯的，其实只要稍加注意，就会尽可能的避免。去除这些习惯性的表述错误，本文是可以成为一篇不错的记叙文的。

批改第1处，语法上没有问题，在此不扣分；

批改第2处，问题两个，扣2分；

批改第3处，问题两个，扣2分；

批改第4处，扣2分；

批改第5处，问题3个，扣3分。

批改第6处，so用句首不合适，扣1分。

最后得分90分。